The Lone Ranger – Quotes
Click here to read SPM’s review of The Lone Ranger.
Tonto: Dead man strikes fear into heart of his enemy.
Will: Wait a minute. You’re saying you’re Tonto? THE Tonto?
Tonto: There was another?
Tonto: Come a time, kemosabe, when good man must wear mask.
Woman on Train: Care to pray with us? We’re Presbyterian.
John Reid (Lone Ranger): Much obliged, ma’am, but this here’s my Bible. (Shows her John Locke’s Treatise on Government)
Cole: Hate to see a bird in a cage.
Cavendish: Lawyer and a crazy Indian? Bet you two got a lot to talk about.
Tonto: Great warrior!
John Reid: Yeah, that’s my brother.
John Reid to Tonto: Hey, hold it there. I’m afraid I have to take you in.
Cole to Rebecca Reid: He takes good care of you, I see.
Rebecca: In his way.
Dan Reid to John: Law looks different on land, little brother.
Dan to John: I hereby deputize you a ranger of the United States. I can’t help you with your clothes, though.
Dan to John: Nice hat, by the way. They didn’t have a bigger one?
John to Dan regarding guns: You know I don’t believe in ‘em one way or another. You know that.
Dan: Butch Cavendish don’t care one way or another.
Tonto to the Spirit Horse as he “chooses” John Reid: No, No! Him half wit. Him (points to Dan Reid) mighty warrior. You have traveled far. Obviously fatigued. I understand. Him strong brother. Bring him back.
Tonto: If you are going to sneak up on an Indian, best to do it down wind.
Tonto: I cannot decide if this horse is stupid, or pretending to be stupid. Tricky.
Tonto: Horse says you are spirit walker. Man who has been to the other side and returned. Man who cannot be killed in battle. Horse definitely stupid.
John: Ow!!! What the h*** was that for?
Tonto: Bird angry.
Tonto: The men you seek think you are dead, kemosabe. Better to stay that way.
John: Where did you get that?
Tonto: Make trade.
John : With a dead man?
Tonto: Hard bargain.
John as Tonto drinks his drink: What are you doing?
Tonto: Comanche gesture of respect –taste another man’s drink.
Tonto as spirit horse drinks beer: Nature is indeed out of balance.
Frank: Some lunatic Indian – he gonna violate me with a duck foot.
John: I haven’t fired a gun in nine years.
Tonto: Might want to keep that to yourself.
Tonto: Great shot!
John: It was supposed to be a warning shot.
Tonto: In that case, not so good.
John: Kemosabe. You keep calling me that. What does that mean?
Tonto: Wrong brother.
Backstory on Tonto: In exchange for a cheap pocket watch from Sears and Roebuck, he showed them where the river began. … They wanted to keep the place a secret [so they killed all his people]…. He couldn’t live with what he’d done. … He decided they were possessed by evil spirits.
So we have a deal?
Tonto: Not so much.
John: The United States Army. Finally! Someone who will listen to reason.
Tonto, as they are buried up to their heads: Could be worse. Could develop itch. On your nose.
John, as scorpions begin to crawl on their faces: This is worse!!! This is worse!!!
Cavendish: You’re no spirit. You’re just a man in a mask. No different from me.
Tonto: Justice is what a man take for himself.
John: I am not a savage.
Tonto: You are not a man.
John: I am not like you. I have a tribe.
Tonto: You have nothing. Like me. Go back to your tribe. I don’t need you, white coward.
Cole: I want to show you something. From the time of Alexander the Great, no man has ever travelled faster than the horse that carried him. Until today. Imagine: time and space, under the mastery of man. Power makes emperors and kings… look like fools. Whoever controls this [holds model train] controls the future.
John: Well, civilized society has no place for a masked man.
Cole: Everything I hate about this country: no vision, no sense of the common good.
Cole: A man can’t choose his brother, can he? It’s almost like his brother chooses him.
John: They staged the attacks to violate the treaty.
Fuller: Well if that’s the truth, it would mean I slaughtered the Comanche for no reason.
Cole: I was at Gettysburg. 12,000 dead before lunch. Know what I learned? Nothing is accomplished without sacrifice.
Will: Mr. Tonto, Mr. Tonto! You mean they killed them all? Mr. Dan? The Indians? Everyone? For silver?!?!
John: You were right. If men like that represent the law, I’d rather be an outlaw.
Tonto, as Spirit horse is standing on a tree limb, in the tree, wearing John’s hat: Something very wrong with that horse.
Tonto: All these years I think you are windigo, but no, you are just another white man.
John: It’s not really a trade. Who would trade a watch for some bird seed?
Tonto: Bird cannot tell time.
John: Hi-Ho Silver! Away!
Tonto: Don’t ever do that again!